Monday, June 16, 2008

Facial Hair Fashions for Women?

If there are two little words that can strike terror into the heart of any woman, it’s these:

Facial hair.

Not on our men. We like facial hair on our men. Five o clock shadow can be sexy on a guy. A goatee can be sexy. On a guy.

We don’t mind seeing this stuff on our men. Seeing it on the face we see in the bathroom mirror every morning can be surreal.

I looked up facial hair on the internet. I had NO IDEA there were so many styles of beards and moustaches! So far I’ve counted 74 STYLES OF FACIAL HAIR! Everything from five-o-clock shadows to bushrangers, which are wild long full face beards accompanied by moustaches and sideburns. You want handlebars? Vandykes? Fu manchus? How about Dalis, Door-knockers or Don Littles? Everyone’s heard of a goatee, but have you ever seen a marooned hulihee?

All of which gives me hope.

If I can’t win the battle against facial hair, maybe I can at least name it something interesting.

I went back over the men’s styles looking for anything that sounded vaguely feminine, but I came up short. Almost every style there sounds really masculine, like The Iron Jaw or Viking beard, for instance.

I don’t know. Seems to me if I’m going to adopt an actual style for my facial hair, I want it to sound airy. Enticing. Pretty, even.

Like The Velvet Fuzz. Or The Butterfly Wing. Or The Chiffon. Something that implies a little texture without going overboard with the testosterone.

Although there was one style on the men’s list that sounded kinda fashionable. It was The French Fork. But I don’t recommend it. I wore one for a month before giving up and calling an electrologist. When she answered the phone, I said “I’d like to have a French Fork removed from my chin.” She told me to dial 911.


Contact Karen, buy books or schedule speaking at www.karenlinamen.com

Posted by Karen Linamen at 23:01:53
Comments

3 Responses to “Facial Hair Fashions for Women?”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Karen, this blog is so awesome! It makes me feel better to know there are others who struggle w/ the same thing I do–haven’t tried the french fork yet…might have to ;)
    p.s. I found your site b/c my mother-in-law has your book that she is reviewing for something (not entirely sure what…) and wanted to see the picture of your daughters room. Couldn’t find it though…

    God Bless-
    Tristan

  2. this blog looks great,i hope i can read your article very soon.

  3. europe says:

    I like the article, but that from the article I know maybe we can be good friends.

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